Rank 15,000 again. Your roommate just jumped. Here’s what actually helps.
You wake up at 5 AM. Again. The ceiling fan makes the same creaking sound it made yesterday, and the day before, and the 287 days before that. Your roommate’s bed is empty now—has been for three weeks. Nobody talks about it, but everyone knows. The coaching institute sent flowers. Your parents called twice, asking if you’re “okay” in that tone that really means “please don’t do anything stupid.”
You’re not okay. But you’re still here.
Research from Lancet has documented that in 2023 alone, 29 students in coaching hubs ended their lives, while India reported over 2,248 suicide deaths attributed to exam failure that year. These aren’t just statistics. They’re the kid who sat three rows behind you in chemistry class. The girl who always borrowed your physics notes. The boy who made terrible jokes during break time.
This isn’t another motivational article telling you to “stay positive” or “believe in yourself.” This is about survival. Real, messy, sometimes ugly survival. Because before you can crack JEE or NEET, you need to learn how to not crack yourself.
The Five Horsemen of the Academic Apocalypse
1. “The 3 AM Panic Olympics: When Your Brain Becomes Your Worst Enemy”
Picture this: It’s 3 AM. You should be sleeping. Instead, you’re calculating exactly how many topics you haven’t covered, how many mock tests you’ve failed, and how disappointed your parents will be when you don’t get into that “top college” they keep mentioning to relatives.
Studies on NEET aspirants reveal that students experience extreme distress in multiple areas including difficulty problem-solving, doubt about their abilities, physical symptoms like headaches and stomach issues, feelings of sadness, worry about parental expectations, and interpersonal problems including social withdrawal and irritability.
Your anxiety isn’t weakness. It’s your nervous system stuck in overdrive, treating every practice test like a life-or-death situation. Which, in your mind, it kind of is.
What Actually Works:
When the 3 AM spiral starts, try the 60-Second Butterfly Hug. This EMDR-lite technique, developed by Lucina Artigas in the late 1990s to help trauma survivors, involves crossing your arms over your chest and gently tapping each shoulder alternately—mimicking butterfly wings—to engage both brain hemispheres and calm your nervous system.
Here’s how:
- Cross your arms over your chest
- Place each hand on the opposite shoulder
- Tap alternately—left, right, left, right—slowly and rhythmically
- Breathe deeply while tapping
- Continue for 60 seconds or until your heart rate slows
The bilateral stimulation activates both sides of your brain, bringing rapid stress relief in just moments. Do this before sleep, during panic moments, or whenever anxiety creeps in.
Research Reference: The Butterfly Hug Method has been documented in EMDR Foundation protocols for bilateral stimulation, originally used with survivors of natural disasters and now applied broadly for anxiety management. Source: https://emdrfoundation.org/toolkit/butterfly-hug.pdf
2. “The Comparison Trap: When Everyone’s Rank Is Lower Than Yours (Apparently)”
Your WhatsApp group is a nightmare. Someone scored 98% in the mock. Another person finished the entire syllabus—twice. Meanwhile, you’re still struggling with the same organic chemistry chapter you started last month.
A 2023 study from Kota revealed that over 85% of students spend six to seven hours daily in coaching classes, with more than 80% wanting at least one day off for leisure activities. The grind never stops, and the pressure to keep up is suffocating.
Social comparison is cognitive poison. Every time you measure yourself against someone else’s highlight reel, you’re feeding the voice that says you’re not enough.
What Actually Works:
Practice the 3-Minute Safe Place Visualization daily. Field observations show that when triggers or ongoing stressors cause high distress, self-soothing techniques can help regulate the nervous system.
Here’s the practice:
- Find a quiet spot (even the bathroom works)
- Close your eyes
- Imagine a place where you feel completely safe—real or imaginary. Maybe it’s your grandmother’s kitchen, a beach you visited once, or a forest you invented
- Engage all five senses: What do you see? Hear? Smell? Feel? Taste?
- Spend three full minutes there
- When you’re done, do eight rounds of the Butterfly Hug while holding that safe feeling
This isn’t about ignoring reality. It’s about giving your brain a break from the constant threat response so it can actually function when you need it to.
Block the WhatsApp groups during study hours. Your mental health is worth more than knowing someone else’s score.
Research Reference: Studies examining NEET and JEE aspirants found extreme academic stress across populations, with significant negative correlations between exam performance expectations and stress levels. Source: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/390052182_An_Exploration_of_Academic_Stress_Among_NEET_JEE_Aspirants
3. “The 16-Hour Study Day Delusion: Productivity Theatre at Its Finest”
You sit at your desk from 6 AM to 11 PM. Your parents see dedication. You know the truth: you spent three hours staring at the same page, two hours on Instagram “just for a minute,” an hour making the perfect study schedule you’ll never follow, and maybe—maybe—four hours of actual learning.
Research on student burnout identifies exhaustion, cynicism, and feelings of inefficacy as core dimensions, with chronic stress leading to negative impacts on mental health, academic performance, and increased dropout rates.
Burnout isn’t about working too hard. It’s about working ineffectively for too long, feeling guilty about it, and repeating the cycle tomorrow.
What Actually Works:
Quality beats quantity. Every single time.
The Mindful Pomodoro Method:
- Study for 25 minutes with complete focus (phone in another room)
- Take a 5-minute break—do the Butterfly Hug or walk around
- After four cycles, take a 30-minute break
- During breaks, practice deep breathing: inhale for 4 counts, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4
This isn’t just time management; it’s energy management. Healthy lifestyle choices including adequate sleep and regular breaks help prevent burnout, while poor sleep quality worsens both stress and academic performance.
Also: sleep is non-negotiable. Research demonstrates that lack of quality sleep negatively impacts cognitive health and academic performance, yet students often sacrifice sleep during exam preparation despite evidence that exhaustion leads to poor concentration. Seven hours minimum. Your brain consolidates information during sleep. Study less, sleep more, perform better. Science is wild like that.
Research Reference: A comprehensive review of student burnout research from 2019-2024 found that burnout significantly impairs mental health and academic performance, while supportive environments and healthy coping strategies help mitigate these effects. Source: https://www.mdpi.com/2076-328X/15/2/170
4. “The Silent Suffering Olympics: Why Asking for Help Feels Like Failing”
You haven’t told anyone how bad it really is. Your parents think you’re doing fine because you said “I’m okay” when they asked. Your friends are dealing with their own stress. The coaching institute counselor seems overwhelmed and understaffed.
So you keep it inside. The worry. The fear. The dark thoughts you’re scared to name.
Despite disturbing consequences, addressing mental health issues in India faces challenges due to social stigma around consulting psychiatrists or counselors, leading to delays in treatment, compounded by severe shortages—only 0.3 psychiatrists, 0.07 psychologists, and 0.07 social workers per 100,000 people.
Suffering in silence isn’t strength. It’s self-sabotage.
What Actually Works:
Start small. You don’t need to open up completely to everyone. Just one person. One conversation.
The Gradual Disclosure Method:
- Identify one trustworthy person (friend, family member, teacher, counselor)
- Start with something manageable: “I’ve been feeling stressed lately”
- Gauge their response
- Share more if it feels safe
- Remember: therapy isn’t failure; it’s maintenance
Use helplines if personal connections feel too risky:
- KIRAN Helpline (India): 1800-599-0019 (24/7, toll-free)
- Vandrevala Foundation: +91-9999666555
- iCall Helpline: 9152987821 (Mon-Sat, 8 AM – 10 PM)
Consider online therapy if local options are limited. Platforms like BetterHelp and Wysa offer accessible mental health support.
Research Reference: Qualitative research with professional students in India reveals that crisis helplines and mental health support systems, while important, need improvement in effectiveness and accessibility, with students identifying family support, peer relationships, and professional intervention as critical for suicide prevention. Source: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10756604/
5. “The Identity Crisis: When You’re Not Sure Who You Are Without the Exam”
Who are you when you’re not studying? What do you like that has nothing to do with physics or biology? When did you last do something just because it made you happy?
You can’t remember. Your entire identity has collapsed into this single goal. Get into that college. Everything else is secondary.
Students report experiencing increased loneliness, mood swings, fatigue, anger, sadness, and depression after moving to coaching hubs, with the intense pressure and lack of leisure activities contributing to mental health crises.
You are not your rank. You are not your score. You are not the sum of your correct answers.
What Actually Works:
Reclaim small pieces of yourself. Not after the exam. Now.
The 15-Minute Identity Reclamation:
- Pick one thing you used to enjoy (music, drawing, writing, cooking, anything)
- Do it for 15 minutes. Just 15.
- Three times a week. Non-negotiable.
- This isn’t wasting time; it’s preventing complete psychological collapse
Developing hobbies such as singing, dancing, painting, writing, reading, or cooking can help students de-stress and develop efficient coping mechanisms for dealing with competitive exam pressure.
Talk to your parents honestly. If they’re reasonable, they’ll understand. If they’re not, do it anyway. Your mental health isn’t optional.
Join a study group where people actually support each other instead of competing. If one doesn’t exist, create it. Shared suffering is lighter than solo suffering.
Research Reference: Analysis of 491 student suicide cases from 2019-2023 in India found that academic stress, institutional factors including bullying and toxic culture, mental health issues, and financial crisis were the primary contributors, with most victims aged 16-21. Source: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/eip.13616
The Uncomfortable Truth Nobody Tells You
Here’s what your coaching institute won’t say: Some of you won’t make it into your dream college. Not because you’re not smart enough or didn’t work hard enough, but because the math is brutal. Lakhs of students compete for limited seats in prestigious institutions, creating enormous pressure where only top performers succeed, while high competition contributes to the elevated suicide rate in coaching centers.
But here’s what they also won’t tell you: Your life won’t end if you don’t get in.
You’ll find another path. A different college. A new dream. Life has this weird way of working out, just not always the way you planned. The people who succeed aren’t always the ones who got the highest rank. They’re the ones who kept going, adapted, and didn’t let one exam define their entire existence.
Your worth isn’t determined by an entrance exam designed to filter thousands of candidates. Your worth is inherent. Full stop.
When the Dark Thoughts Come
If you’re reading this section, you’re probably in a bad place right now. Maybe you’ve been there for a while. Maybe it’s getting worse.
Listen carefully: Your life has value beyond this exam. Always.
Suicide rates among students aged 15-29 in India are among the highest globally, with intense academic pressure, punishing study schedules, parental expectations, and lack of recreational activities identified as key contributing factors.
Those dark thoughts? They’re not truth. They’re your exhausted brain telling you lies. Depression lies. Anxiety lies. Burnout lies.
Immediate Action Steps:
- Call someone right now. Parent, friend, counselor, helpline—anyone.
- Remove means. Get rid of anything that could be used for self-harm. Give it to someone you trust.
- Change location. Go to a public place. Coffee shop. Library. Temple. Anywhere with people.
- Make a safety plan:
- List three people you can call in crisis
- List three places you can go
- List three things that have helped before (music, walks, specific videos)
- Tell someone you’re struggling. Use these exact words if you have to: “I’m not safe right now. I need help.”
Crisis Resources (India):
- National Suicide Prevention Helpline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
- KIRAN Helpline: 1800-599-0019
- Sneha Foundation: +91-44-24640050
- Vandrevala Foundation: +91-9999666555
- iCall Helpline: 9152987821
Your parents will recover from disappointment. They will never recover from losing you.
The Way Forward: A Different Kind of Success
Success in JEE/NEET preparation isn’t about grinding until you break. It’s about finding a sustainable rhythm that doesn’t destroy you in the process.
Your New Study Protocol:
Morning (5:30 AM – 1:00 PM):
- 5:30 AM: Wake up, Butterfly Hug (1 minute)
- 5:40 AM: Deep breathing + Safe Place Visualization (3 minutes)
- 6:00 AM: Study (Pomodoro method)
- 10:00 AM: Physical movement (walk, yoga, anything)
- 10:30 AM: Study continues
- 1:00 PM: Lunch + actual break (no study guilt)
Afternoon (2:00 PM – 6:00 PM):
- 2:00 PM: Study (Pomodoro method)
- 4:00 PM: Social connection (call a friend, family time)
- 4:30 PM: Study continues
- 6:00 PM: Physical activity
Evening (7:00 PM – 10:00 PM):
- 7:00 PM: Dinner + relaxation
- 8:00 PM: Light review/practice
- 9:00 PM: Hobby time (15 minutes minimum)
- 9:30 PM: Prepare for bed
- 10:00 PM: Sleep (non-negotiable)
Notice what’s included: breaks, movement, social time, hobbies, sleep. These aren’t luxuries. They’re requirements for your brain to function.
The Bigger Picture
Following widespread student suicides, some Indian states introduced supplementary exams providing second chances for failed students, resulting in 70% reduction in exam failure suicides in Tamil Nadu and 82% in Chennai. Policy changes work. Support systems work. Compassion works.
But policies take time. Right now, you need strategies that work today.
Your Survival Checklist:
- ☐ Practice Butterfly Hug daily (especially during anxiety spikes)
- ☐ Do Safe Place Visualization once per day
- ☐ Sleep 7+ hours nightly
- ☐ Block comparison triggers (WhatsApp groups during study time)
- ☐ Maintain one hobby (15 minutes, 3x weekly)
- ☐ Connect with one supportive person weekly
- ☐ Take at least one full day off per month
- ☐ Reassess study methods monthly (efficiency over hours)
- ☐ Keep crisis numbers saved in phone
- ☐ Remember: You are more than your rank
A Letter to Future You
One year from now, you’ll look back at this moment. You might have gotten your dream rank, or maybe you didn’t. You might be in that prestigious college, or maybe you’re on a different path entirely.
But here’s what will matter: you survived. You didn’t let the pressure break you. You asked for help when you needed it. You practiced self-compassion in a system designed to make you feel inadequate. You remembered you were human.
The students who thrive long-term aren’t the ones who sacrificed everything for one exam. They’re the ones who learned to take care of themselves while working toward their goals. They’re the ones who understood that mental health isn’t a luxury—it’s the foundation everything else is built on.
Be that student.
Final Thoughts: You’re Not Alone
If you made it to the end of this article, thank you for staying. Thank you for fighting. Thank you for being here.
The system is broken. The pressure is real. The competition is brutal. But you are not broken, not weak, and not alone.
Recent research emphasizes that changing academic curricula to reduce stress, ensuring campuses are free from harassment and bullying, and prioritizing student mental health should be the education system’s biggest focus.
Until systemic changes happen, we take care of each other. We share strategies. We normalize asking for help. We refuse to let this exam define our worth.
You’ve got this. Not because you’re going to ace every test (you might not), but because you’re learning to survive the process without losing yourself. That’s the real victory.
Remember:
- Butterfly Hug: 60 seconds when anxiety strikes
- Safe Place Visualization: 3 minutes daily
- Sleep: 7+ hours, always
- Help: Never more than a phone call away
Your life matters. Your health matters. You matter.
If today feels impossible, just make it to tomorrow. Then do it again. That’s all you need to do.
One day. One hour. One breath at a time.
You’re going to be okay.
Research References Cited:
- Lancet Regional Health – Southeast Asia (2024): Exam failure suicides and policy initiatives in India
- URL: https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lansea/article/PIIS2772-3682(24)00093-3/fulltext
- Early Intervention in Psychiatry (2024): Student Suicide in India: Analysis of Newspaper Articles (2019-2023)
- URL: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/eip.13616
- EMDR Foundation: The Butterfly Hug Method for Bilateral Stimulation
- URL: https://emdrfoundation.org/toolkit/butterfly-hug.pdf
- Mental Health Center Kids (2025): The Butterfly Hug: Coping Skill for Anxiety and Trauma
- URL: https://mentalhealthcenterkids.com/blogs/articles/butterfly-hug
- ResearchGate (2025): An Exploration of Academic Stress Among NEET & JEE Aspirants
- URL: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/390052182
- MDPI Psychology (2025): Student Burnout: Review on Contributing Factors
- URL: https://www.mdpi.com/2076-328X/15/2/170
- The Print (2025): NEET, JEE exams causing mental health crisis in India
- URL: https://theprint.in/opinion/neet-jee-exams-causing-mental-health-crisis/2158249/
- Indian Psychiatry Journal (2023): Qualitative study on undergraduate professional students on suicide
- URL: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10756604/
